I travel together with my grandmother. And I am looking for my grandmother who has strayed. My grandmother is an elderly lady. She is a little short and plump. In addition, she has short, curly silvery white and big eyes. And her face is covered with wrinkles. When she was last seen, she was dressed in a red knitted coat and gray pants. If you see her, please contact with me as soon as possible, thank you.
she has short, curly silvery white and big eyes.
回覆刪除問一下喔。＂white＂的後面需要加＂hair＂嗎？
If you see her, please contact with me...
＂with＂應該要去掉吧。
And her face is...
＂And＂可以換成其他連接詞，
像＂Besides＂、＂moreover ＂等。
如有誤，請不吝嗇指教。
我的意見跟妤如差不多
回覆刪除可以把and換成期他連接詞~
she has short, curly silvery white 後面應該要加hair吧~~
回覆刪除你的主題句沒寫耶!!
回覆刪除My grandmother is an elderly lady. 這是廢話嗎??
結論是這不像一篇完整的文章
沒有電話怎麼聯絡你???
I travel together with my grandmother
回覆刪除改成
I travel with my grandmother together
會不會比較好一點?
short, curly silvery white是指頭髮嗎
short, curly silvery white是指....?
回覆刪除你的and多多喔!
換別的吧!
以上~
啊拉拉拉~
我覺得一開始怪怪的
回覆刪除你們一起去旅行，就突然說你正在找她
你可以說當你在做什麼的時候，她就不見了
而且這應該是要過去式吧!
I travel together with my grandmother.
回覆刪除改成
I travelwith my grandmother together.
感覺比較通順~~~
short, curly silvery white
跟大家說的一樣後面少了hair哦:D
1....she has short, curly silvery white and big eyes.
回覆刪除→she has short, curly silvery white hair and big eyes.
2....please contact with me as soon as possible, thank you.
→please contact me as soon as possible, thank you.(建議可以簡略說明聯絡方式)
(以上，淺見…)